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Lust in the Dust
Lust in the Dust is episode fifteen of season three on Full House. It originally aired on January 26, 1990. Opening Teaser D.J. and Stephanie are jumping rope in their room as Michelle watches. Then Michelle gives it a try, and needless to say, she doesn't fare well. Synopsis For what seems like the millionth time, Danny has once again broken a date, and this time, he says it is because her earlobes were not the right size. D.J. and Stephanie set Danny up with Stephanie's dance teacher, Karen Penner. The girls also do what they would do with any romantic "couple": set them up with a candlelight lunch (instead of a dinner). However, when Danny and Karen later go to her apartment, he sees what a mess it is, and breaks yet another date. It turns out that Danny has been deliberately nitpicking and finding mostly trivial things wrong with his dates so that he can have a reason to cancel them, because almost three years after Pam's death, he is still hesitant about dating again. Jesse and Joey convince him to give Karen another chance. Speaking of Jesse and Joey, they've been hard at work with their latest marketing campaign for canned sardines. Apparently, Joey tries his best at being the "spokesfish", but Jesse thinks the voice needs work because he thinks Joey's never had a sardine before. Meanwhile, Michelle has been taking things that belong to others and hiding them, such as Joey's tape recorder, Stephanie's pen, and D.J.'s cassette tape; latter two of which are in her room and she returns to both sisters immediately, while the tape recorder is located by D.J. just as she is about to have breakfast, as she discovers it in the cereal box. And neither she nor Joey are happy about it (see Quotes). In the meantime, Jesse is really late for an important rehearsal with his band because his keys are missing, and he needs them so he can start his motorcycle and open their rehearsal hall. After the older girls say that they have not seen them, Michelle is accused of taking and hiding Jesse's keys. D.J. asks him if he has an extra set of keys, and he sarcastically says that if he had, he wouldn't be at the mercy of a 3-year-old (see Quotes). When she shows a set of plastic-colored keys, he decides they'd better retrace every step she took, starting downstairs. And Michelle can only giggle as he carries her downstairs. Speaking of which, the interrogation continues in the living room, where D.J. simply asks Michelle to just come clean, once and for all, and to just plain reveal where she hid Jesse's keys; they (as in all 3, or even all 4 of them; Michelle included) really—and badly—want to move on with the rest of their lives, put the whole mess behind them, and pretend it never even happened. When Michelle still insists she didn't hide the keys, both D.J. and Stephanie have their own plans of getting answers from their little sis to their questions (see Quotes). Jesse comes downstairs, remarking that he's looked in every room and trash can, still having no luck and still accusing Michelle of the crime. Everything is resolved when Joey comes home with a bunch of sardine cans in hand from their new project and points out that Jesse left his keys in the front door. Jesse apologizes to Michelle for thinking she took his keys, Michelle forgives him, and Stephanie allows Michelle to have the rest of her Popsicle. Then, later, after another chat with Danny and Joey regarding tonight's events, Jesse heads off to his rehearsal...but once again, he can't find his keys, but this time the Popsicle-eating Michelle has them, for real, and hands them over after hiding them under her booster seat. Then, with a quick "Hey Michelle, look! Big Bird!", he takes a bite out of her Popsicle when she isn't looking. Quotes and Joey are working on their new commercial in the living room. Joey: I did a real fun voice on my tape recorder this morning. Hey, where'd my little tape recorder go? searches for it. Michelle: Ha ha ha ha. Joey: Oh now, that's a suspicious little giggle. Michelle, do you know where my little tape recorder is? Michelle: sing-song Yes I do. Joey: And where is my tape recorder? Michelle: The tape recorder's hiding. Joey: It's not fun to hide other people's things. Michelle: It is for me. D.J.: Look! I found this tape recorder in my cereal box. This is a much better prize than those plastic dinosaurs. Joey: Thank you. I'll take that. at Michelle and holding it up Oh, look what I found. Michelle: Aw, nuts. Danny: with a cleaning bucket and supplies OK, I'm on Saturday bathroom patrol. Joey: Wait, I thought you had a date with Joan 'what's her name'. Jesse: No, it's June 'what's her name'. Danny: It's Jane 'what's her name'. And it doesn't matter 'cause I broke off the date. ---- [Jesse asks the girls if any of them have seen his keys.] D.J.: Not me. Stephanie: Not me. [They angrily turn their attention to Michelle; Jesse folds his arms, D.J. puts her hand on her hip, and Stephanie just has her arms at her sides.] Michelle: What did I'' do? ---- makes their way to Michelle's room as she returns all the stolen loot, or so they think. '''Michelle': I hid this tape. D.J.: Michelle! That's my Milli Vanilli tape! Stephanie: And you called me a Milli Vanilli thief. I demand an apology. D.J.: In your dreams! Stephanie: I accept. Jesse: Hey, Michelle. While I'm young. Michelle: Here, Stephie her pen. Stephanie: Michelle! My sparkle pen! You're old enough to hear this now: How rude! Michelle: Why does she always say that? Jesse: Hey, Michelle. I'm growing a beard here. Come on, I'm late. Where are my keys? Michelle: OK, OK. shows him a set of colorful plastic keys. There. Are you happy now? Jesse: Yeah, I'd be happy if I were driving a Fisher-Price Harley. ---- the living room... D.J.: Please. Just tell me where you hid Uncle Jesse's keys so we can get on with the rest of our lives. Michelle: I did not hide the keys. D.J.: I know what'll make you talk. It's time for the tickle rockets. appropriately so, she makes a 'rocket' launch with her fingers and also does a launching sound, and tickles her sister. OK, now where are the keys? Michelle: I don't know. Tickle me again. D.J. does, when... Stephanie: from the kitchen with a sweet treat Michelle, look what I'' have. '''Michelle': A Popsicle! Stephanie: Take a lick. does so, and as Stephanie moves the Popsicle from left to right and vice versa.. You can have the rest, when you tell us where the keys are. Michelle: she moves her head with the Popsicle I don't know. ---- Joey: Danny, you're making yourself nuts looking for the perfect woman. There’s no such thing as ‛the perfect woman’. Danny: Yes, there is. I was married to her. Jesse: Hey, Pam was my sister, and I loved her very, very much. But, come on, man. She was always late, she spent way too much time in the bathroom. When I was little, she used to hold me down and stick carrots up my nose. Trust me; she wasn’t perfect. Trivia The episode title likely came from the 1985 film . Goof: When Jesse says goodbye to Joey because he has to go to his rehearsal, Jesse has his black bag in his right hand and his keyboard case is in his left, but in the next shot of Jesse, his items are in opposite places. Category:Season 3 Category:Episodes